just
you
and me♥
lets talk
people say that

"letting go doesn't mean giving up. it means moving on. it is one of the hardest things a person can do. starting at birth, we grasp on to anything we can get our hands on, and hold on as if we will cease to exist when we let go. we feel that letting go is giving up, quitting, and that as we all know is cowardly. but as we grow older we are forced to change our way of thinking. we are forced to realize that letting go means accepting things that cannot be. it means maturing and moving on, no matter how hard you have to fight yourself to do so."
27.6.08 @ 12:05 AM
violet hill;
i'm amazed by how easily i can get tanned, or rather burnt, jst by standing at merlion park watching canoe polo. much easier than going for 10 water trgs. my chest is red, like a half-cooked lobster (!!!) ohwell anw, its been an amazing 4days at merlion park, having the inaugural PUB champs, watching some exciting polo matches and getting my back all wet by the merlion's saliva. its all worthwhile cos i got t watch an interesting and tight final between hotdogs and el clasico. haha i'm still excited t watch even though i get t watch them play every week. well anw been walking up and down chinatown these 4days. for my sch proj, i've been walking like a crazy girl. and i've been walking fr chinatown t merlion park t home daily. the distance i've chalked up's amazing. and i'm even more amazed by the fact that i've been walking relentlessly under the scorching sun, yes like an idiot, cos i realised i've walked the longer way for 2days before i know there's a shortcut. wth and now my thighs are aching like i've ran 4.8km. damnit

anw i'm so going t run and gym tmr. i'll be going for napfa soon and srsly i wish for nothing but a gold. yes i'm so going t pressurise myself t the point of breaking down. hahaha ok i think i'm alr stressed up. thats why im uttering rubbish. i havent been gymming as well. for 2 wks. so i feel weak, like shit. i know for sure if i dun gym tmr, i'll not pass well, row well, keep well, do anything well. and end up getting scoldings aft scoldings which i'm freaking tired of. i don't want that anymore so yea, jiayou. but for now, its jst one word, simply - CHUI!

i'm alw feeling pressed for time. i dunno why. ok maybe i know, jst that the stubbornness in me is telling me not t admit t my mistakes and let them be. hmmm issit because of my poor time management? issit because of my inability t multi-task? or issit because i know i ought t forgo something cos i've too many on hand but yet i'm so stubborn t so i'm trying hard t hold on t them all greedily? for them all, i think so. ohwell, i think i'm starting t get nonsensical. jst typing for the sake of typing. so they're kind of meaningless. don't take them t heart then haha i'm feeling cranky and whiny now. i srsly have no idea, maybe i shd go and slp soon. but why am i so reluctant t shut my eyes and get t heterotopia, where i seek the other side of me, the abnormalcy within me, or rather, the normal and real me?

ok i'm very confused by myself. i'm beginning t question: when am i actually speaking the truth? truth be told, i lie alot. i don't know if this blog's informing readers more about the real me or are they jst make-ups? mannn why am i making life difficult for myself? why do i feel that i'm suppressing alot of my emotions, concealing them hard enough so no one's able t enter my world? i want t yet i'm trying hard not t. i don't know why in the hell am i doing this? maybe trying t act mysterious, trying t arouse curiosity of noseyparkers like you.

FINE I THINK I RLLY SHD STOP CRAPPING.






so if you love me,
why'd you let me go?

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